Babyitis

Dina rolled

2008-04-04T17:35:00.001+02:00

3 months and 4 weeks old and she did a full roll from her back to her
stomach. I'll have to be watching her like a hawk from here on out.
I have a feeling she'll be on the move as soon as she can figure out
how to get her chubby little body going.

My huge baby

2008-02-18T15:03:00.000+01:00

Dina had a little check up today. She’s 8.8 kilos/ 19 lbs and 66 centimeters/ 26“ long. That’s great for a 6 month old. But my little bundle is only 2 months old. Oh, and did I mention the tooth that’s coming in?

Dina Isabel

2008-01-07T09:16:00.000+01:00

Dina was born at 10:49 a.m. on Thursday, December 13th. Exactly a week past my due date.

The good part--other than having a beautiful baby--is that the labor didn't last that long. I had my first contraction at about 6:15 that morning and they were about 8 minutes apart. By 8:00 am they were 5 minutes apart and we were on our way to the hospital. By the time we got there it was 8:45, the contractions were 3 minutes apart and I was 8 centimeters dilated. Two miserable hours later she was born.

But this labor made me appreciate just how easy I had it with Emma's birth. Apparently I'm fine delivering a 4670 gram/10lbs 3oz baby (Emma) but a 5058 grams/11 lbs (Dina) was really friggin' hard. Go figure. I didn't have the sense of well being that I had after Emma's birth, I guess it was losing so much blood and having (oof) stitches. And no drugs. A decision I regretted.

But everything about this pregnancy was hard. And almost immediately I felt so much better than I did during my entire pregnancy. I could think again, and even though I had to recover I had more energy. I cried in the car on the way home the next day because I was so relieved (I'm sure hormones had nothing to do with that) that I didn't feel... handicapped anymore. I literally felt like I had a chronic illness throughout my whole pregnancy.

Emma has been doing great with Dina. No issues to date, other than a few bouts of temper when she feels she's not getting enough attention. At least, I think that's what is upsetting her. She's 2 years and 8 months... so it could be anything. But she wants to hold Dina, and help change her and bathe her. She likes giving her kisses and stroking her face. She's really quite sweet with her.

Today is Lars' first day back to work and Emma's first day back to daycare after the holidays. As I've been writing the sleep deprivation just hit hard--and I realized I can take a nap! Zzzzzz

My huge bump

2007-11-27T08:39:00.000+01:00

Even I was shocked to see this picture. I knew I was huge, but this was beyond my expectations. It was taken almost a week ago, so I think I'm even bigger. I really, really want this baby to come out and last night I thought it was going to happen. I woke up at 4:00 am with some pain (but not steady contractions) and thought, "this is it!" I couldn't get back to sleep, but now in the light of day I'm just huge and uncomfortable again.

Potty Time

2007-11-27T08:36:00.000+01:00

Emma used the potty for the first time yesterday! We've been watching Elmo's Potty Time, which does seem to inspire her. And last night, she put her pee pee in the potty! Elmo would be so proud.

Go Go Emma

2007-10-22T13:53:00.000+02:00

This is from last November, but it's still so cute. She still loves to dance.

Great Blog!

2007-10-13T19:09:00.000+02:00

I just got an update email from Planned Parenthood with a link to a great blog, "I Am Emily X". It chronicles the life of a Planned Parenthood worker who is encountering protesters--anti-choice people who are calling their harassment "40 days
for life."

It breaks my heart that in a country where the health care system is a travesty, these people feel that they have nothing better to do than persecute women who need affordable reproductive health care. This is one of the things that make me grateful to live in Denmark. Denmark is one of the most family focused countries in the world, certainly a hundred times more than the U.S., and there is never a conversation about a woman's right to choose in the news. It's not questioned that, of course, a woman has the right to choose her own path and to plan when she's ready for parenthood.

Good scan

2007-10-09T18:52:00.000+02:00

I had a good scan yesterday. Everything looks great, including the placement of the placenta, so no c-section for me. The baby is quite big, she's 2.5 kilos already (over 5lbs) and I'm only 32 weeks! I'm preparing myself for another 5 kilo baby (between 10-11lbs).

Radio Silence

2007-10-09T10:32:00.000+02:00

Everything is fine with the baby. And technically, I'm fine too. Blood pressure, blood sugar, weight, are all fine. But this has been a miserable pregnancy. My back is killing me. I have what is known in Denmark as bækkenløsning. I'm not even sure what it's called in the U.S. I did find an article on Babycenter about posterior pelvic pain, which sounds very much like what I'm experiencing. I'm currently on medical leave from work because of it.

The bottom line is that I feel bad every single day. It's the fatigue, headaches, back pain and sick stomach. I don't have morning sickness anymore, but my stomach hasn't been right since I had campylobacter for the entire month of August. Every visit to the doctor or the midwife has included a discussion on how I am 41...apparently I'm just old to be having a baby.

I have another scan today to check on the placenta. The 3D scan we had in August was amazing and we did see that it is a little girl.

(Maybe) it's a girl!

2007-07-15T09:38:00.000+02:00

I had my 18 week scan, although it turns out I'm 19 weeks... they've pushed up my due date to December 6, 2007. Everything looked good, with the exception of the placement of the placenta. At the moment, I have placenta previa. Not to worry yet, though. I'll go back for another scan in my 3rd trimester to see if it's moved, and there's a good chance that it will.

So, we're not 100% sure, but it looks like it's a girl! I'm sure we'll be able to tell at our 3-D scan on August 29th. Can't wait!

Sick and Tired (in the best way)

2007-06-10T20:51:00.000+02:00

It's been quite awhile since my last blog, but I think I should be excused. You see, the one dose of hormones did the trick and I am just coming out of my first trimester! I'm expecting a little bundle of joy sometime around December 7th.

Everything looks good this time around. I've already had 4 scans, all of which were very positive news. The last one was to assess the risk of Down Syndrome. For my age (41) it's 1/50 -- scary. After the scan and bloodwork, it's been assessed at 1/1050. I'm so excited. Or I would be if I wasn't still extremely tired, still throwing up, feeling overworked at the job and at home. Emma is excited about becoming a big sister, but that doesn't mean she gives me a break. Lately I've been going to bed before she does.

The latest is an onset of allergies. The weather is absolutely beautiful here and I am a sneezing, watery eyed, nose blowing mess. I will be pleading with doctor on Tuesday to give me something so I can at least function. I'm a mess!

Back to the drawing board

2007-02-28T22:49:00.000+01:00

I'm off to the fertility clinic again tomorrow morning. I'll probably start the hormones in the next couple of days. I will be so glad to stop thinking about getting pregnant again, which I will do one way or another. If I'm not pregnant by this summer, we've decided to stop... if I have another miscarriage, that's the last. So here's crossing my fingers (and toes and eyes and anything else that will cross) that this time will happen soon--and will take.

PBS Kids: Sesame Street

2007-02-19T22:14:00.000+01:00

I want Sesame Street! Emma loves the Sesame Street "Do the Alphabet" DVD. She asks for it everyday, "Alphabet! TC (how she says TV)!" And she loves when I start singing the songs. But I really want her to see the TV show! I've got to see if any of my American friends (hint, hint) will tape for me--well, not tape it, I don't have a VCR. I need someone to record it on DVD for me... This is some of what makes me homesick for the states.

Miscarriage Redux

2007-01-06T15:34:00.000+01:00

I didn't post about this pregnancy. I think I will with the next one (yes, there will be a next one). I was more than a little spooked about it and had some vague superstitious idea that I didn't want to "jinx" it.

When I went for the fertility appointment, the doctor could tell I had just ovulated. We joked that I wouldn't need to take the hormones she had prescribed. Sure enough, I had a positive pregnancy test just before my 41st birthday. We kept this one a little quiet and only told the people we'd tell if something went wrong...

The Monday before we went to the U.S. for Christmas, I had a scan. The doctor felt something didn't look right so I had my HCG levels taken that day and then again on Wednesday. I was completely convinced that it would be bad news, but the doctor called and the numbers had almost doubled! (The numbers double every 48 hours in early pregnancy) We had another scan and she said things looked better. The little black area that was the beginning of a baby (or so we had hoped) was the right size. We left for a Merry Christmas with my family in Michigan.

All was fine until New Year's Eve. While at the zoo with my sister and her family, I started spotting. We went to the emergency room and got the bad news. Ten days after the last HCG reading, the number was nothing where it should be. The black area hadn't grown and there was no fetal pole, let alone a heartbeat (which at 7 weeks, we should have seen both). On Jan 2nd, I started bleeding and cramping in earnest. We got back to Denmark on Jan 4th and I called my doctor and went to the hospital. There it was confirmed, I was slowly aborting the pregnancy. We decided to move the process along and I had a D & C. I spent my first night back in Denmark at the hospital.

I'm a little numb at the moment. Especially after realizing that I've been keeping this blog for a year now (and trying for a second baby for longer than that). We're still committed to trying for another child, but there is most definitely a time limit.

Here's hoping the third time is the charm. If it's not, it will be the final straw...

Reversing Trend, Big Drop Is Seen in Breast Cancer - New York Times

2006-12-15T08:38:00.000+01:00

What great news. According to this article in the New York Times, the most common form of breast cancer dropped 15% from August 2002 to December 2003. And overall, all breast cancer types dropped by 7%.

Hopefully this trend will continue!

Out of the mouths...

2006-11-28T07:50:00.000+01:00

Emma is starting to string words together. Her first combination is "Mor arbejder" ( "Mommy works" or "Mommy's going to work") and "Mor bye-bye". While I'm very happy she seems to be developing nicely, this word combination is not making me happy! For one, I really, really want her to call me Mommy instead of Mor, which she just won't do. Do I have to even point out the amazing amount of guilt attached to the other aspect of her saying how much I work, and how much I leave her? Harsh.

Oh well. Off to work...

Fertility Help

2006-11-27T20:59:00.000+01:00

So, I saw a specialist today. We're trying the least agressive method possible, all I have to do is take some hormone pills for 4 days a month. The doctor warned me that the pills could make my stomach hurt. Why do I think that's an understatement? If I'm not already pregnant (that would be ironic), I'll start the pills in about two weeks.

Pacifer at 16 months?

2006-09-11T09:16:00.000+02:00

Suddenly, one day, Emma started freaking out when seeing a pacifer.

"Den der" (that there in Danish) she yelled. "Den der, den der, DEN DER" as she melted into tears pointing furiously at the pacifer.

So, we've been giving her pacifers. She would have nothing to do with them before this. When I was breastfeeding and would have given anything not to be used as a human pacifer, she turned up her nose. Yesterday, she tried to fit two into her mouth at the same time.

Here I thought we had by passed the pacifer weaning quite nicely. Oh well.

She walked!

2006-06-19T21:32:00.000+02:00

Emma took her first steps yesterday! Twice she walked without holding on to our hands and took a tentative step or two. How exciting!

The rabbit still lives

2006-06-16T09:30:00.000+02:00

I was having imagined pregnancy symptoms... they certainly weren't real.

Father's Day

2006-06-16T09:24:00.000+02:00

Well, Lars is college educated, so according to this study, Education Linked to Better Fathers, he should be a good father. But he's an AMAZING father, as is evidenced by Emma's absolute adoration of him.

With Father's Day coming up, I wanted to give props to the best father (and husband) I know.

The waiting

2006-06-03T14:31:00.000+02:00

...is the hardest part. I'll know by next week if I'm pregnant again and despite all the mental energy I spend on trying to decipher potential pregnancy symptoms, nothing will make me know any sooner. At the moment I don't know if I can stand another six months (or longer) of this, just to live in terror for the first 3 months of another miscarriage. But as discouraged as I feel right now, I still feel like it's my destiny to have another child.

I guess I can hold on for another 3 days...

Unfortunate baby names

2006-05-30T09:37:00.000+02:00

So, the genetic blessed Shiloh Nouvel Pitt-Jolie is not so nominal blessed... What is it with celebrity and unfortunate baby names?

For Moms, there's no place like Denmark

2006-05-10T20:57:00.000+02:00

According to the The Copenhagen Post, Denmark was second only to Sweden in the Save the Children's annual "State of the World's Mothers" report.

According to Save the Children, the disparity between the best countries and the worst was bleak: a woman in Scandinavia is 750 times more likely to survive childbirth than in some African countries. Infant mortality rates were 28 times lower.

I'm still feeling lucky...

Infants Mortality

2006-05-09T12:00:00.000+02:00

I find this article, "Infants Dying for Lack of Basics" in the New York Times hearbreaking. I think an unexpected side effect of Emma's birth is how lucky I feel. We are so incredibly lucky to live in Western Europe, or eventually the U.S. I think the events of last month added to the that feeling... I am so lucky to have such a lovely healthy baby.

Miscarriage con't

2006-04-24T15:23:00.001+02:00

This really dragged on. I guess I should have had the D&C when I first miscarried, but I thought my body would take care of it. Instead, I spent Friday and Saturday in the hospital. First they tried to use medication and when that didn't work, they performed a D&C.

It's over now, and I finally feel like I'll recover. I've had a hard time talking about this... I've felt like my heart was in my throat and if I tried to talk I just cried. But even now, as I start to feel better, I wonder what there is to say. I have no words on hand to describe the loss, and I don't have the energy to try to find them. It's just time to move on.

Miscarriage

2006-04-14T15:30:00.000+02:00

One in five pregnancies end this way. And the odds go up when you hit 40, increasing to 35%. I shouldn't be surprised that it happened to me. The fact that I was so shocked feels a little like hubris.

I knew something was wrong because I had no morning sickness. I told myself, "this is just an easy pregnancy" ignoring the fact that I knew for a fact that nothing was going to be easier at 40. But I still saw my doctor, expecting a firm reassurance. Instead, she ordered blood work and a scan. I think it was the one time I wanted her to not take me seriously. "Oh, you have nothing to worry about" was what I expecting to hear. Not the "it doesn't sound good" that she actually said.

Despite the cramps I had on Monday, the excruciating backache and not being able to sleep, Lars and I showed up at the scan Tuesday morning fully expecting to see a little heartbeat. We didn't. At eight weeks, the fetus was just the size of 4 or 5 weeks. "Are you sure you have the dates right?" asked the midwife. "There's no doubt" I said. "I'm sorry" she said. And we both broke down.

I went to the emergency room and had more blood work and another scan. We were sent home and told to call Wednesday morning for the results of the blood work. I woke up Wednesday morning already knowning the answer. I had started bleeding.

I went to the hospital to have a D&C, but just as the nurse came to get me, my body aborted the fetus. I was given meds and sent home. I took one dose of the meds and got a hive, so I stopped taking them. The last thing I need now is an allergic reaction. Today I feel fine physically... nothing more than a normal menstrual period. Emotionally I'm better off than I expected. The one strange emotional side effect has been a relunctance to be around Emma. I hadn't expected feeling resentment that I couldn't really have time to grieve. Lars has been great--very supportive and picking up all the slack. I think all I need is just a little time... and maybe a little more time to myself.

This experience has definitely shown us how much we want another child. That's one of the things that's keeping me going. It'll work next time... or the time after. I know I've got at least one good egg left.

Great pancake recipe

2006-04-08T11:51:00.000+02:00

My friend Vikki made these pancakes for a baby shower and they were great. I met Vikki in the hospital; she had a baby boy a few days after I had Emma. Apparently her 11 month old son and her 3 year old daughter loves pancakes.

Golden-Nugget Oatmeal Flapjacks

Makes about 48 silver-dollar sized pancakes

1 cup whole milk
¼ cup apple juice concentrate (I just use ¼ - ½ cup regular apple juice)
2 tablespoons butter or margarine, melted
1 whole egg
2 egg whites
1 cup whole-wheat flour
½ cup rolled oats
½ cup wheat germ (hvedekim)
2 ½ teaspoons low-sodium baking powder
¼ cup non-fat dry milk
1 ½ teaspoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon (optional)
½ cup dried apricots, finely chopped
Vegetable cooking spray

1.) Beat the whole milk, juice concentrate, butter, egg and egg whites together in a large bowl. Add in the remaining ingredients through the vanilla (or cinnamon if using) and beat just until smooth. Fold in chopped apricots.
2.) Spray a skillet or griddle with vegetable cooking spray. Heat over medium-high heat until very hot. Reduce the heat to medium and spoon batter to make 2-inch pancakes. When the surface of the pancakes begins to bubble and the bottoms are nicely browned, about 2 minutes, turn and brown and the other side, about 1 minute more.

Best Odds Toddler Servings in four 2-inch pancakes: 2/3 whole grain: ½ protein, some calcium, 1/6 Fat.

What every baby needs to thrive

2006-03-27T11:21:00.000+02:00

It's common sense, but it's really, really good to be reminded of these things in this BabyCenter article What every baby needs to thrive:

Hug, touch, smile, encourage, listen to, and play with your little one whenever you can. It's also important to answer his cries immediately, especially in the first six months or so, when experts say it's impossible to spoil a child. In fact, responding to your baby when he's upset (as well as when he's happy) helps you build trust and a strong emotional bond.

I'm leaving today for a week long business trip, the first one since Emma has been born. It's going to be a long week without all those hugs and smiles.

Dreams for my daughter

2006-03-22T08:58:00.000+01:00

I don't know how every conversation I have at work ends up incorporating my daughter... well... ok, I have a clue. Yesterday morning, in one of these conversations, I mentioned that I'm not a natural disciplinarian. My overriding attitude in general is, "hey, if it's good for you". But she won't know what's good for her if I don't teach her how to know. My goal is to teach my daughter to be a fully functioning adult--to know how to take care of herself and others, to know how to make hard decisions, to be confident in her ability to navigate in the world.

It seems obvious. I'm sure that what every parent wants for their children. But it really sank in when I said it outloud. That's why I'm documenting it. I want to keep it in the front of mind when I'm faced with a screaming toddler, or a screaming teenager. How will the decisions I make about my daughter help ensure she has all the tools she needs when she goes out into the world?

The Thin Pink Line

2006-03-12T10:01:00.000+01:00

Yep, that's a pregnancy test! I took it Friday morning. The instructions say that even if the line is faint, it's still positive. Just to be sure, I took another one today. Same results (darker line)!

According to BabyCenter.com's online pregnancy calculator, my due date is November 18th. I go to the doctor on Thursday, so I'll see if she agrees.

So, I am in my 5th week. It hasn't sunk in yet... I've wanted this so much for the past 6 months and I thought I would be giddy (I was when I found out about being pregnant with Emma). My giddiness has been tempered with a "oh my god, what have I done?" feeling in the pit of my stomach. It's going to be an interesting 9 months! Oh wait, I'm getting giddy again! Whew-hoo!!!

So, I'm starting this pregnancy 5 kilos heavier than the last one at 75 kilos (hey, I'm 5' 10", it's not that bad!). I'm trying not to think of this time as the food free for all that it was last time. I haven't had the debilitating morning sickness yet, and although my back, ankles and hips already hurt, I still feel pretty spry.

So... here we go!

And so it begins...

2006-02-25T07:30:00.000+01:00

How long since has Alito has been appointed? South Dakota see it's chance and is passing a law to ban abortions.

"I think the stars are aligned," said House Speaker Matthew Michels, a Republican. "Simply put, now is the time."

I'm so sad and disappointed I don't what else to say.

Really? This tired?

2006-02-24T07:58:00.000+01:00

I've heard for years how hard it was to be a working mother and how tired new parents are. But, is this for real? Is it ever going to end? I thought when she slept through the night it would get better. It's really not.

This morning she woke up at 4 am, and none of us could get back to sleep before we had to get up at 5:30. During breakfast, she poked me in the eye and it really hurt (no, really). So now I'm at work, having trouble keeping my injured eye open.

Luckily, this is my last day at work before a two week vacation. Whew-hoo! Not only do I get to spend lots of time with Emma (and Lars), I'll get to nap. It's so sad that I'm more excited about taking naps than going to Copenhagen this week-end to see Depeche Mode. Well, not really. Since it's an Emma-less overnight trip, I'll get to sleep in on Sunday! Yay!

Winter Colds

2006-02-17T09:53:00.000+01:00

This past week-end, Emma had a bad cold. She was coughing so hard she threw up. I freaked out. I took her to a week-end clinic to make sure she wasn't dying... what do I know? If I was coughing so hard I was throwing up, I would be convinced I was dying.

Lars was in Germany and I would have been all alone when this happened if my friend Kelli hadn't come by. She remained calm in the face of my freak out ("Oh no, oh no, what DO I DO?!") and made the clinic appointment for me in Danish. I'm sure they would have understood my panicked English, but it was nice to have someone to help (Kelli is an American also living in Kolding but she can actually converse in Danish, unlike me).

BabyCenter.com has a good article on treating colds. Thank god for Infants' Tylenol, it was the only way either one of us got any sleep. She's much better now, but has a lingering cough which will probably stick around until May.

Breastfeeding Tips

2006-02-12T09:05:00.000+01:00

I had this idea that since breastfeeding is what nature intended that it would be easy. It. Really. Isn't. The first 2-3 weeks hurt like a motherf*cker. I was completely miserable, dealing with thrush, mastitis (twice) and bleeding nipples. But at about 3 weeks or so, everything clicked into place (although I did have another bout of mastitis later) and was great. No making formula, no carrying bottles, it's the best thing for your baby and the bonding that happens during breastfeeding is simply amazing.

I just weaned Emma completely about 3-4 weeks ago, only because I'd like to have another baby. At 40 that ain't gonna happen while I'm nursing, even if I was down to only one time a day. But I still miss it, much more than she does I think.

Here are some tips for nursing. I especially agree with the Lansinoh and the Boppy, both of which I had to import from the U.S. I've heard other places that starting with Lansinoh at the end of you pregnancy can help prevent some of the soreness. I'll be trying anything and everything next time...

Love IS a drug

2006-02-07T16:32:00.000+01:00

I love (ha!) this story on BabyCenter.com. According to this article, when you hold, nurse or rock your baby both you and the baby get a rush of dopamine. "Incidentally, dopamine is the same compound that 'rewards' users of heroin or cocaine. In a very real sense, addicts who get hooked on drugs are simply chasing the feeling that flows between a mother and her baby."

I guess it explains the sensation I've had of just swimming in love when I'm holding Emma. I gush to my childless friends that I just didn't know--I couldn't have known what it would be like to have a baby. I recently had a coworker remark that I've embraced motherhood in a way that was inconceivable when I was a tough, single 30-something career woman in NYC Mmm, was I that much a stereotype? Am I now? Who cares! I'm drowning in love hormones and I like it!

Zzzzzz

2006-02-02T13:51:00.000+01:00

I haven't blogged lately because I've been more tired than I've ever been in my life. I've heard the plight of working parents for years but I never KNEW. Work is so busy (and surprisingly interesting), Emma is cutting new teeth (hence, not sleeping) and I am tired, crabby, overeating and about to fall asleep at my desk.

Personal Choice

2006-01-22T13:34:00.000+01:00

Today is the 33rd anniversary of the Supreme Court decision in Roe v. Wade and I've signed up to blog for choice. I've been thinking for the past week about what to write, and I decided to get personal. I've been pregnant three times in my life and I made three different choices.

The first time was when I was 19 and a freshman in college. I came very close to having an abortion, but my mother talked me out of it. Before the baby was born, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. Shortly after the birth, she died. Without the support of my mother I felt I couldn't raise a child and I gave him up for adoption. That was the hardest and most painful decision of my life.

Two years later, when I was 21 and engaged to be married, I found out I was pregnant again. I think on some level I knew what a horrible mistake I was making to marry that man. I just knew that neither he nor I were ready for a child. He was very excited about the news and we fought bitterly about my decision to terminate the pregnancy. The marriage ended badly a year later and I have never second guessed the choice I made to have that abortion. I know I did the right thing.

Now I'm 40, married to the love of my life and have the most beautiful 8 month baby. I am blessed to have this family. But I wouldn't be here if I hadn't made the choices I've made in my life. Personally, I can't think of anything worse than feeling like you're in a situation where you don't have a choice.

One of the great things about Denmark is that I don't hear about "Pro-Life" here. This is the most family oriented place I've ever seen, yet no one questions that a woman can choose what she wants to do with her body. Choosing a name for your baby is more restricted than deciding whether or not to have that baby!

Don't let the choice be taken away in America! This is an ongoing fight that has to be taken. Sign petitions at Planned Parenthood and Campus Progress. See how else you can get involved at Planned Parenthood. Read more about the issue at Guy2K and capitolette, who has also blogged for choice.

Royal baby

2006-01-21T13:15:00.000+01:00

The TV here has been taken over by the live broadcase of little 3 month old Prince Christian's baptism. The little prince was born on October 15, 2005, but this is first time that his name was announced. This is not entirely uncommon here in Denmark, and I find it a little strange... for example, I knew what we were calling Emma from the time we found out it was a girl (because she's named after my late mother) but they wouldn't refer to as another other than Kaae, Pige (girl) in the hospital.

Baptisms are a big deal here in Denmark. Emma didn't have one because I felt that it would be hypocritical on my part, but we still had to register her birth with the church. We also pay a parish tax... I find this hard to accept as an American... Yet another thing (but certainly not the last thing) that's hard to accept is only first names approved by the government can be used. This is a quote from the Information for new members of Danish society web site:

"You are not allowed to give your children a first name that could be to their disadvance and expose them to teasing by others. The Danish Ministry of Ecclesiastical Affairs (Kirkeministeriet) has published an official circular listing all the approved names. The list can be downloaded from the Ministry’s homepage.You must apply to the Ministry of Ecclesiastical Affairs (via your parish office) for permission to give your child a name not included in the circular."

This is why everyone has the same name in Denmark... but there is a stipulation which could be helpful, considering a number of names on the top 100 baby names in the U.S. are not allowed in Denmark:

"Any parent who is or has been a subject of another country is entitled to give his or her child a name that is not approved in Denmark, provided that it is a common first name in the home country of one or both of the parents."

"Subject of another country" "Crown prince" "parish tax"... I'm not in Kansas anymore...

Easing the guilt

2006-01-18T16:54:00.000+01:00

Another great idea by working mothers. Why not have office space at the day care? That's exactly what they'll be doing in Copenhagen. (Mathilde and Magnus?! Mmm)

You would think in this family friendly country I live that the family friendly (toy) company my husband and I work for would have day care on premise. They do in their U.S. offices, but not here. Instead we're looking to move to the little podunk town where the company is located. I guess it doesn't really matter... the population of this entire country is less than the city (NYC) I moved here from...

Definitely NOT

2006-01-17T19:34:00.000+01:00

...Pregnant, that is. Again.

I was so ambivalent before getting pregnant with Emma. I went off the pill in August 2003. Of course for the first few months if I was an hour late I thought I was pregnant. But it died down. I think it was May when I started thinking, "shouldn't I be getting pregnant by now?" It was summer when I bought ovulation tests, and I ended up returning them because I found out I was pregnant at the end of August 2005. I had just started to think about it, so I was shocked. I took 3 pregnancy tests, thinking there had to be a mistake. Then the euphoria set in and it hasn't quite left.

At some point during my pregnancy I knew I wanted two children. And since I was 39 when I gave birth to Emma, I knew the second would have to follow closely. I talked about timing with my doctor and she suggested that we start trying again at 6 months. We stopped using birth control at 4 months... I was still breast feeding, but started using the ovulation tests. I had also heard that a woman is more fertile after giving birth. I was reading all these stories about women who accidentally got pregnant a few months after giving birth. I just found out one of the mothers in my mother's group is pregnant again last week... Without meaning to be... But she's not 40. Bitch.

Saying I want another child just doesn't do this feeling justice. I believe that it is my destiny to have another child. I am obsessed with having another child. I will be heartbroken in an epic way if I don't have another child...NOW.

So now I have another month of trying. I remember hearing a friend complain about this and thinking, lots of sex? Great! You'd think it would be fun, right? It just ends up being stressful.

This is exactly where I tried not to be: desperate to get pregnant. I know, if it doesn't happen I have a great, wonderful, beautiful daughter and I am blessed. But I know it's my destiny to have two wonderful, beautiful children. I just know it is.

Signs of a bad nanny or babysitter

2006-01-17T15:11:00.000+01:00

BabyCenter has a good article listing signs of a bad nanny or babysitter. Luckily, Emma has a good day care mother (direct translation from Danish) that she is very fond of... in fact, sometimes too fond of, it sometimes makes me a little jealous. Like this morning, when Emma could care less that I was dropping her off for the day.

We manage to communicate well despite the fact that she doesn't speak English and my Danish skills are rubbish.

There's enough mommy guilt to be had without worrying about bad care givers.

Information on SIDS

2006-01-16T21:34:00.000+01:00

When I was 19, my mother volunteered to babysit her friend's three small children for a week. It was the first vacation for the parents in many years and they jumped at the chance. The youngest child was a six month old baby named Jordan. I had less than no interest in babies at that point in my life and my mother thought she would remedy that by leaving me to care for Jordan at every possible chance. As beautiful six month old babies are wont to do, he won me over by the time the week was out.

A few weeks later, I'll never forget the date, on March 8, 1985, Jordan died of SIDS. I was devasted and I have been paranoid about SIDS ever since. I found a great post on Daddy*drama's blog about preventing SIDS which includes a great link to a really thorough Pediatrics article.

Emma is sleeping soundly right in her Sleep Sack, on her back, with no toys or pillows in her crib.

Baby Movie

2006-01-15T10:49:00.000+01:00

Every Wednesday afternoon, the movie theater here in Kolding has a showing of a current movie specially for mothers with babies. They provide a changing table and microwave just outside the door so you can still see the movie while taking care of those basic needs. I went to a lot of these movies when I was on maternity leave and Emma was smaller. It was the easiest thing to have her sleep in my arms and breastfeed during the movie. I took last Wednesday off last week and went with one of the women in my mother's group (more about that in another post) and realized that Emma is a bit too big and curious for this to be a pleasant outing. The movies start at 11:30 which interrupts her long afternoon nap. At least I thought that's why she didn't sleep, but a tooth did appear on Thursday, so maybe that was why. It gets filed into the "I don't know why my baby did that" category.

I've seen articles about this gaining popularity in many American cities, so it's not just a European phenomenon. I loved it when Emma was very small, it was easy to take her and I got to get out of the house. I definitely plan on doing this again with the next one (more about that in another post).

Tooth #3

2006-01-13T09:58:00.000+01:00

Emma just cut her third tooth. The first bottom two came at the beginning of October and although we repeatedly think she is teething this is the first sign of anything new. She is such an easy baby. I've heard horror stories about teething babies, but she had a day of being a little off and a night or two of restless sleep and it was done.

The odd thing is it's her top eye tooth, not the front tooth. Is that strange?

Ut oh. I just read the ADA's page on teething. We've been brushing Emma's two little teeth with toothpaste. I guess we should stop that...

Handysitt

2006-01-08T14:16:00.000+01:00

I am a product junkie, there is no doubt about that. The new focus of my mania for finding the newest and best (and most expensive) is the wonderful world of baby products, of course. Where are the cutest clothes? What are the best feeding accessories? What can I buy to make her sleep at night? I am constantly surfing the web for the latest and greatest from America and making my friends and family ship it to me (Thank you by the way).

This handy thing, the HandySitt, is actually made here in Denmark. Not just anywhere in Denmark even, but in Billund the small town where I work. We used this for the first time yesterday at my in-laws house and it is the best thing to travel with because of how flat it folds. It's very light and it hooks on to any normal chair. It's much better than lugging around our Ikea ANTILOP high chair, which is a great value by the way. It's under $20 (or 95 dkk) and I like it better than our fancy Tripp trapp (or KinderZeat)--at least right now.

Rice Porridge Recipe

2006-01-05T20:27:00.000+01:00

Here are some recipes for homemade rice porridge, which you can start feeding your baby at 4 months. Of course, the standard advice is to wait to introduce solids until six months if you're breast feeding. But you'll know if your baby needs to eat.

"They" say that feeding a baby doesn't help her sleep through the night. All I can say is that my little angel stopped waking up every two hours when I started feeding her rice porridge during the day.

The thin porridge can be given in a bottle. I could never give this to Emma because she absolutely refused to take a bottle.

Thin Porridge (grød in Danish)
1 cup of water
2 tsp corn flour or rice flour
1 cup of formula or breast milk
-Let the flour and water boil for 1-2 min. Let cool to room temperature and add formula.

Regular Porridge (to feed with a spoon)
1/2 cup of formula or breast milk
1/2 cup of cold water
2 1/2 tbsp of corn or rice flour
1 tsp butter
-Bring the flour, formula and water boil and reduce heat. Cook for 2½ min and remove from heat. Add butter and let cool to room temperature.

The butter is actually quite important. I can't remember where I read that normal fat in a baby's diet helps their brain develop. Normal fat meaning a baby SHOULD NOT be on a low fat diet like the mommy who is trying to lose those last 10 lbs from pregnancy that just won't come off.

Big Babyitis

2006-01-03T20:41:00.000+01:00

I'm here to add to the mountains of information that's on the web about babies. Not that I have all the answers, oh, goodness no. But having eight months of parent experience I think makes me an expert. Not just on the past eight months, I have plenty to say about the next 20 years.

I do spend a lot of time hunting for answers to my burning baby questions online--and only sometimes finding them. I read a few baby blogs as well, and sometimes can relate to them. I have a tendency to read American web sites and blogs, since I'm American... but I live in Denmark and that just opens a whole new can of baby worms.

My husband is Danish, and has Viking blood running through his veins. I'm no petite flower and we have produced a very large (and beautiful) baby girl named Emma who was born on May 1, 2005. I named her after my late mother but lucky us, it happens to be the number one baby name of 2005 according to BabyCenter's Top 100 names of 2005. Emma was 10lbs 3oz, or 4670 grams as they told me here in metric land (I hate doing math). According to my BabyWeekly newsletter, "At eight months old, babies usually range from 25.25 inches long and 15.25 pounds (10th percentile) to 28.5 inches long and 20.5 pounds (90th percentile)." Emma is 30.3 inches (77 centimeters) and 20.9 pounds (9.5 kilos). So what percentile is that? (I just said I hate doing math)

Needless to say, she eats a lot. This was the last day of our Christmas holiday from work and I spent almost the entire day making baby food. While I was on maternity leave, I made all the food we fed her and I can't bring myself to commit to buying baby food in jars. I have no idea why I'm like this. I'm not crunchy by any stretch of the imagination. I certainly have no crazy ideas about making her clothes or anything like that... but I keep making baby food. I also can't quite bring myself to wean her, but that's a whole other story for another blog...

So baby food recipes was one of the first things I looked for online and was disappointed. I just wanted to know how to make some rice porridge and stew some damn fruit and I couldn't find it anywhere. I finally realized that there are baby food recipes in the back of "What To Expect The First Year". I've moved on to the lentil stew and lentil casserole recipes today. We now have three ice cube trays of this grayish lentil and vegetable paste in our freezer. She seems to like it. She likes it better if I add a little cottage cheese to it. I don't know what I'm going to do as she gets older about food. I find the whole process of feeding her utterly baffling. What kind of nutrition does she need? How do I feed her without giving her the same hang ups about food I have?

Well, it's 8:30 p.m. on a school night, which I'm sorry to say is past my bedtime.